Lucas woke up after talking with her and falling asleep to find Layla gone. He sat up in the bed in his boxers thinking about the way things had been lately. He's been falling short  and hadn't been the warrior that he knew he could be. He needed to talk to Layla about things, more than he had. He felt he wasn't doing her or their marriage justice. He wanted them to work and he knew that he'd push her away if he didn't step up and be the man he wanted to be, that he could be. Not the insecure guy he'd become, he trusted Layla to never hurt him. He needed to show her that, needed to be the secure guy he once was. And he wasn't the guy who let people hit him and bruise his wrist. So he waited for Layla to get back so he could talk to her.

Lucas was laying in bed, he was wearing just his boxers. He was clutching Layla's pillow in one hand and the photo of her face in the other. He'd finally fallen asleep in bed without her, mostly due to exhaustion. Iggy was laying on the top of his pillow, his head rested on Luke's neck.

He had decorated the room in her absence with Peyton's help.

On the wall with the headboard of the bed, were five drawings, they were arranged diagionally. The first was a drawing of him and said the word 'I'. The second was a drawing of them sitting at a table. There was a plant and a half eaten breakfast on the table. It was of the day they first met. It had the word 'Will' on it. The next was a drawing of them on their wedding day holding hands on the alter. It had the word 'Always' on it. The next drawing was of the two of them kissing. It had the word 'Love on it. The last drawing was of her and had the word 'You' on it. Together them made up the sentence 'I will always love you'.

Underneath the drawing was the quote from his book that he'd told her. It was written in a dark gold paint.

'Suddenly it was as if the world around him melted away and all that was left was Layla. The girl whose plants, passion, and beauty had changed my life. In that moment, my triumph was not comforting her, but simple clarity. The realization that we had always been meant for each other and every instinct to the contrary had simply been a denial of the following truth - I was now and would always be in love with Layla Williams - Lucas Scott.'

The wall to the right had a a rainforest painted on it. The wall to the left was of the Rivercourt, like he had painted in his bedroom at home.

*Lucas had been thinking about his tradition with Haley while Layla was away*

1. Layla will still be beside me as read this a year later. She'll still love me, want me and need me the same way. She'll still think about me and look at me the same way she does now.

2. Layla will be happy and be getting out of the room all the time.

3. Layla will be back in touch with nature and will have what she wants.

4. I'll have finished my book.

5. My mom will find love again and her and my sister will be healthy and happy.

6. Nathan and Haley will still be together and be happy with my little Nephew.

7. My nephew will be healthy and have a loving home.

8. Peyton Sawyer will find someone she loves who loves her back the same way and will be happy.

9. Layla and I will be talking about having children together, and still be having lots of practice.

10. Layla will always be in my heart and my head and I will always love every part of her.

*He stowed the piece of paper away in a box and placed it at the bottom of the wardrobe. He'd ask her when she got back if she wanted to do it too*

Suddenly it was as if the world around him melted away and all that was left was Layla. The girl whose plants, passion, and beauty had changed my life. In that moment, my triumph was not comforting her, but simple clarity. The realization that we had always been meant for each other and every instinct to the contrary had simply been a denial of the following truth - I was now and would always be in love with Layla Williams.

"Robert Louis Stevenson wrote: 'you can not run away from weakness; you must fight it out... or perish. And if that be so, why not now, and where you stand?'"

"Every normal man must be tempted, at times, to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag and begin slitting throats."

"Henry James once wrote: 'Be not afraid of life. Believe that life is worth living, and your belief will help create the fact.'"

"John Steinbeck once wrote: 'Change comes like a little wind that ruffles the curtains at dawn, and it comes like the stealthy perfume of wildflowers hidden in the grass.'"

"George Eliot once wrote: 'There is no despair so absolute as that which comes with the first moments of our first great sorrow, when we have not yet known what it is to have suffered and healed, to have despaired and have recovered hope.'"

"There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment, you must choose your direction. Will you fight to stay on path? Will others tell you who you are? Or will you label yourself? Will you be haunted by your choice? Or will you embrace your new path? Each morning you choose to move forward or simply give up."

"There comes a time when every life goes off course. In this desperate moment who will you be? Will you let down your defenses, and find solace in someone unexpected? Will you reach out? Will you face your greatest fear bravely? And move forward with faith. Or will you succumb to the darkness in your soul?"

"Regret comes in all shapes and sizes. Some are small like when we do a bad thing for a good reason. Some are bigger like when you let down a friend.

Some of us escape the pain of regret by making the right choice. Some of us have little time for regret because we're looking forward to the future. Sometimes we have to fight to come to terms with the past, and sometimes we bury our regret by promising to change your own ways.

But, our biggest regrets are not for the things we did -- but, for the things we didn't do. Things we didn't say that could've save someone that we care about. Especially when we can see the dark storm that's headed their way."

"Do you ever wonder if we make the moments in our lives or if the moments in our lives make us?"

"If you could go back and change one thing about your life, would you? And if you did, would that change make your life better? Or would that change ultimately break your heart? Or break the heart of another? Or would you choose an entirely different path? Or would you change just one thing, just one moment? One moment, that you've always wanted back."

William Blake once wrote; "There are things that are known and thing that are unknown, and in between, there are doors.

"Sometimes I wonder if anything is absolute anymore. Is there still right and wrong? Good and bad? Truth and lies? Or is everything negotiable, left to interpretation, gray? Sometimes were forced to bend the truth? to transform it because we are faced with things that are not of our own making. And sometimes, things simply catch up with us."

John Steinbeck once wrote; 'It seems to me that if you or I must choose between two courses of thought or action, we should remember our dying and try so to live that our death brings no pleasure on the world.'"


"What A frightening thing is the human, a mass of gages, and dials, and registers, but we can read only a few and those perhaps not accurately." -- John Steinbeck

"And the little prince said to the man, 'Grownups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome for children to be always explaining things to them.'" -- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

"T.H. White said; perhaps we all give the best of our hearts uncritically…to those who hardly think about us in return."


"Katherine Anne Porter once said; 'There seems to be a kind of order in the universe…in the movement of the stars and the turning of the Earth and the changing of the seasons. But human life is almost pure chaos. Everyone takes his stance, asserts his own right and feelings, mistaking the motives of others, and his own.'"

"Nathanial Hawthorne once wrote: No man, for any considerable period, can wear one face to himself -- and another to the multitude, without finally getting bewildered as to which may be the true."

"Tennessee Williams once wrote; When so many are lonely as seem to be lonely, it would be inexcusably selfish to be lonely alone

"Octavio Paz once wrote; Solitude is the profoundest fact of the human condition. Man is the only being who knows he is alone."

"Kahlil Gibran once wrote; 'You're reason and your passion are the rudder.. and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. For reason, ruling alone, is a force confining; and passion, unattended, is a flame that burn to it’s own destruction.'"

"Charles Bukowski once wrote; 'There will always be something to ruin our lives. It all depends on what or which finds us first. You're always ripe and ready to be taken.'"

"Joseph Conrad once wrote: 'Who knows what true happiness is, not the conventional word.. but the naked terror. To the lonely themselves, that wears a mask, the most miserable outcast hugs some memory.. or some illusion.'"

"Stephen King once wrote: 'Time takes it all, whether you want it to or not. Time takes it all, time bears it away.. and in the end.. there is only darkness. Sometimes we find others in that darkness, and sometime we lose them there again.'"

"And Hansel said to Gretel, 'Let us drop these breadcrumbs... so that together we find our way home. Because losing our way would be the most cruel of things.' This year.. I lost my way."

"Tennessee Williams once wrote; 'We all live in a house of fire. No fire department to call. No way out. Just the upstairs window to look out of while the fire burns the house down… with us trapped, locked in it.'"

"Henry David Thoreau once wrote: 'Live each season as it passes; breathe the air, drink the drink, taste the fruit and resign yourself to the influences of each.'"

"Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote: 'All are architects of fate... living in these walls of time.'"

"Henry Wadsworth Longfellow wrote: 'All are architects of fate... so look not mournfully into the past. It comes not back again.'"

Lucas walked back to the room. He fumbled in his pocket for the key and opened the door to the bedroom he shared with Layla.

It was dark inside.

'Odd', he thought since he'd been expecting Layla to be there.

He noticed a magnum of champagne cooling in an ice bucket on the table and there were candles lit all around the place.

"Layla," he called out with a smile.

Ever wonder how long it takes to change your life? What measure of time is enough to be life-altering? Is it four years, like high school? One year? An eight-week walking tour? Can your life change in a month, or a week, or a single day? We're always in a hurry to grow up, to go places, to get ahead...

*She moved around to pull off her shirt.*

Aye aye, sir.




Once she had taken off her shirt he poured some of the hot oil onto her back and started to massage it into her upper back and shoulder.

Lucas walked into the bar. He was wearing jeans and a dark grey shirt. He looked around and saw that the bar was empty except for Layla, which was good. He smiled, feeling a little nervous. He started to walk over to her.

*She walked in past him and smacked him in the center of the chest. Pushing past him. She stopped inside and waited for him to enter.*



He walked in behind her and closed the door. He didn't do anything, just looked at her.

After the reception Lucas led Layla back up to their bedroom. He had picked up a few things to make it special.

He smiled warmly at her and swept her into his arms again, carrying her over the threshold again.

He let her down inside the door. He hugged her close to him.

"Baby, I have a few things to set up in here. You mind waiting in the bathroom for a moment?" he asked.

"Sure," he said. He stood up and went into the room to grab a few blankets, pillows and the comforter. He brought them back out onto the balcony and lay them down. He lay down and waited for her.


*She came back out just wrapped in a blanket and wearing scrunchy socks and holding a box. She handed him the box and laid down next to him. She unwrapped herself from her cocoon once underneath the comforter and pressed herself up against him. All of her skin was a little shilled from the cold, she had nothing on.*

Lucas walked back to the room with the basketball on his hip. He was still wearing the Ravens uniform and was sweaty from playing.

He opened the door and walked to the bedroom. He was looking forward to Layla seeing it, to seeing her reaction. He hoped she liked it.

"Layla," he called.

*She groaned softly, but didn't move too much, worried she would harm the dress. She panted heavily.*


He moved his hand behind her back and undid the zip of her dress, continuing to kiss her.

Uh huh. *She pulled off the hoodie and then zipped up the tent, she crawled into the bed next to him in her flimsy cotton panties and half wife beater tank top, laying on her side. Ass pressed up against him. Soon, she was making soft, little noises of pleasure. Two could play at this game.*


Right at that moment he didn't care that he was giving in because he had a need for her building all day. He moved his mouth to hers and started to kiss her hard and needy.

(Backdated to after being drinking with Murphy)

Lucas stumbled his way back to to Layla and his room. He managed to open the door and walked in.

"Layla," he called out. He started to take his clothes off. He stripped down until he was just in his boxers.

OUT of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be,
For my unconquerable soul,
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced or cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments is the scroll,
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul. (William Ernest Henley, Invictus)